Wednesday, February 10, 2010

BH&G's Skinny on Staying Slim

I've got a secret. I wish I was one of those skinny types. Little did I know this whole training-at-the-gym thing was overrated. I could simply be eating my favorite waistline-friendly technicolor treats, once I confirmed that I was on the road to "reduction." Thanks, Better Homes and Gardens, for Eat and Stay Slim (c)'68.Not one to keep knowledge to myself, I'm sharing a few of my favorite excerpts from BH&G's lettuce and cottage cheese infused book. Even if the chances of abiding by it are slim to none. First, find out if you're a candidate for reduction, by checking for "telltale bulges." How?
  • Stand erect, sink your chin into your chest and look downward. If you can't see your toes without craning your neck, you have something to lose.
  • Tense your abdominal muscles as if someone were aiming a blow at you. While doing this, press your fingertips over your midriff. If the fat pad over underlying muscles feels soft and cushiony, you could spare some of it. A physically fit person [read: not you, fatty] should be able to feel the hardness of tensed muscles and even see a nice muscular ripple or two.
  • Try the "pinch test," it gives another clue to excess fat. Lie flat, relax, dig thumb and finger into a fatty area, and pinch. This gives a gauge to the thickness of fat over muscle.
Now that you literally feel fat, think about feeling the burn. Luckily, BH&G has done the math, translating the calorie burn from what I can only assume is their top 9 list of familiar foods that made you fat in the first place. Know now, that when you are noshing on these 9 [okay 8] naughty eats you can eas-il-y burn the calories later with a 3.5 mph walk in mere [well, more like mega] minutes:
  1. Large apple [2o min]
  2. 2 slices of bacon* [18 min]
  3. Glass of beer* [22 min]
  4. Doughnut* [30 min]
  5. Boiled egg [15 min]
  6. Hamburger* [70 min]
  7. Apple pie (1/6 pie)* [75 min]
  8. Ice cream soda* [50 min]
  9. Soft drink* [20 min]
Okay. It's obvious now why there were many inches to pinch in the 60s. But what a lively lifestyle they led! Time well spent putting beer and doughnuts before sneakers.

*totally worth it!




6 comments:

  1. Stand erect, sink your chin into your chest and look downward. If you can't see your toes without craning your neck, you have something to lose.

    What if you have large boobs?

    If the fat pad over underlying muscles feels soft and cushiony, you could spare some of it.

    Welcome to anorexia!!

    Dang. Guess I better get back on the treadmill.
    __
    Barbara
    http://ifididnthaveasenseofhumor.blogspot.com

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  2. Heidi come on over and pick up your Happy 101 award at www.vonlipisfavorites.blogspot.com

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  3. Keep Fit Be happy...isn't that an oxymoron?

    Dianne

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  4. I've seen this book before and I can't help thinking that the title
    "Eat and Stay Slim" is a metaphor for an eating disorder.

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  5. eating disorder for oxy-morons, for sure. just put the flipping girdle on and forget about it, eh?!

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  6. That white china bottle thingy on the cover looks very - judgmental to me. It is saying: yeah, that's a steak, but don't think you're going to get all of it. Or any of it! It's cottage cheese for you, lady.

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